I need relationship advice!!?

ok ladies,


here's the deal.me and this woman were dating and then after awhile she ran into a lot of stress with looking for a place to move to, raising a kid, looking for a new job and what not. so she decided that she really wasn't ready for a relationship. she wants to go back to being friends and if we go somewhere from there then okay. but she said she just wasn't ready. she still wants to hang out and stuff. i really do love her so i'm confused. should i take it at face value and realize she wasn't ready yet and hangout with her and see what happens. so why is she not ready for relationships especially when i was so great to her.I need relationship advice!!?
Sound like she just did not want to hurt you feelings. If you do still want to be with her, you should remain CLOSE friends but do not try to make any moves on her and nicely reject hers if attempted (at least for a good while). You should start dating other girls and inform her of this like you would to a good guy friend. After a while she will realize what she lost and the rest will fall in to place just don't run back you need to walk back for this to work.I need relationship advice!!?
well just be nice and kind and don't go to fast with it.
I see what you are saying. and being a good guy and all. you need to move on. if this is stressing her out this much she may never be ready. you need to find someone who is ready to settle down and be in a long term relationship. you shouldnt wait on just one person when there are others who are waiting for a guy like you.
Don't blame yourself...if you haven't treated her right then she wouldn't want you to be friends with her. Help her a little...try looking for a place with her or just go and help her just to feel less stress...


Good Luck:0)
I had a very similar situation. A girl I was dating, and getting serious with, decided to end our relationship and just be friends. She didn't feel that she should be in a serious relationship. So, we became friends. We'd hang out but then things would get a little ';sensual'; between us. She initiated everything. So after the third-fourth time this happened I was getting confused. Did she want me as a ';booty call?'; Did she think of me as a boyfriend? What was the deal?? Basically, she did not know what she wanted. She cared about me but my values were different from hers... I was agnostic she was a super christian. Finally, I stopped seeing her and hanging out with her because she had no idea what she wanted and it was making me feel like an idiot. I tried to give her what she wanted, but she was soo confused that it blew up in her face. I'd say, take your current relationship at face value. See what happens. If she starts wanting to get frisky and such, confront her on it. If all she wants is a fling, the decision to continue that relationship is up to you. If all she wants is space. Give it to her. Maybe things will work out, but DO NOT let her take advantage of the fact that you love her. My ex still tries to get in contact with me, but I decided that it was in the best interest for us not to have a relationship.
well it hard to tell someone what they should do, cuz on the out side lookin in, u cant feel the others feelings in there relationship. since you ask tho, i would say be careful, cuz your feeling is there hers is backing up.. she is also saying in so many ways shes open to dating other people.. dont wait around for any one, you deserve better, anyone does.. you can change your heart and just be her friend, or leav her alone... sorry
for 1 she has a lot on her plate and a man ontop of it all just adds stress. Just stay by her side help her where she needs it and as soon as all the stress is gone she can thank you and relaxe. I hope it does work out but you do have to put yourself in her shoes and see how hard it is for her.
i think that she might need time to straighten her life a little bit before going into a relationship
If you really love her you'll wait for her. I suggest helping her kids or finding an appartment. It will help remove the stress. Another thing is dont take it personally. She is probably just trying to figure out some things with herself right now.





Hope everything works out
you need to give her some time cuz she has stress
funny how you did not mention your relashonship with the ';kid'; at any time. isnt it. its because you do not care one bit about that child only you care about is sex with the women.
well shes worried so take it a day at a time
It's hard but you sound like you really love her. Stand by her side during this rough patch. She seems to know that you'll be supportive otherwise she would of just broken up with you with no chance at a future.


Be strong it's hard but you guys will come out of this stronger for the love and support you gave her through a diffucult time.


Communicate as well. Knowing where she's at and where she's going will help you understand how she's doing with things.


Good Luck!
the thing that i would recommend is just to be there for her. she may need you to watch her kid sometime, do her the favor. the more respectful, kind, and helpful you are the more chances you may have. but for now, stick to being a good helpful friend.
Sounds like she is ready to slow down. I don't think she wants to be anything but friends. It is possible that it has something to do with her child or the move.
She is very preocupied and is under a lot of stress as you say. It shouldn't come as a real shock to see that she isn't ready. Ready, as in not ready to move into a relationship because she has to solve more urgent things. She trusts that you are a great guy and wants to stay with you even after the ordeal is over so that the relationship can resume. So don't give up hope, she hasn't dumped you or anything. She just needs to get more urgent things done before she can spend more time with you. So as her friend, help her in any way possible to lessen her load. That way, you two can bond much more and the relationship will be better than before. Good luck.
I think she really loves you too. She realizes that shes going through too much in her life that she can't give you her all. I dont think that she thinks it's fair to you to put in the effort on your part of the relationship and she's not. Just be her friend, be there for her in her time of need. and when she's ready, she'll let you know. respect her for breaking it off when she knows that she cant put an equal effort in instead of using you.
If you let anyone play with your heart, they will break it.


You are about to respect her feeling as she steps on your?





Tell her you are ready for a relationship, take it or leave it, then you can give her a little time to straighten out.
mmm im sorry to here that but she wanst ready and we cant change that what you can change is her mind not what has already happened sooooooooo i want you to tell her how u feel and and tell her its ok you'll walk her through it and then slowly solve all the problems she had like the finding a proper job raising a kid getting a place to move.. walk here through it step by step as if your really are in a realationship you did say you loved her and then tell her can you get back together


wish you best of luck


-Khadeja
Some people just don't think that they can handle a relationship with everything else going on in their lives. I don't think its that she doesn't like you. She will tell you when she is ready. For now just stay friends and give her the space she needs
give her the chance to get settled again raising a kid is tough be there for her but yet give her the space she needs and if u love her and she loves you then it will work out
Sounds like she is a smart woman and needs to focus on the real issues that are effecting her and her childs life. Looking for another job and a new place to live is very stressful. Maybe she just need you there for moral support for now, and as a friend.


And if you are demanding (in some sort of way - like when can I see you.?.etc..) And she isn't sure, that may be stressing her out. You can still love her as a friend, but give her space to get her life together.. You know they say, you can't love another until you love yourself, and right now she may not feel very secure about herself because of her very stressful situation.


I understand her point, nothing against you, she just need to focus on her life right now. Just be there for her.
She probably just got overwhelmed and scared. If shes not completely pushing away from you, I'd say wait it out. Maybe she just really wasn't ready for it, but she thinks that with time she will, and she wants to be with you when she is.
Set a time limit for yourself. If not ready for a relationship by that time, move on.
She has a lot of things on her mind right now, like you said she's under a lot of stress. Just let some of those things pass and when she'll have more free time it will be back to what it was like before.
sounds like she's using you





its up to you if you carry on letting her - but I think its a recipe for hurt if you do





Try and be strong and protect yourself





My advice would be to drop all contact as you like her more than a friend - and she wants to call all the shots





She is a commitment phobe - for whatever reasons from her past - but don't you want a REAL relationship?....a 2 way thing?





She is happy to call the shots and will crush you - believe me!





sorry to say it





but cut your losses.....give yourself time to recover - and find someone who's not scared of having a relationship!!!
Talk to her. Say that you are confused. dont say it at a bar but do say it at a romantic place. Say that you do love her and say if you are not ready to have a relationship with me (meaning you) then say that youll wait for her until she is ready. peace ;)
I would venture to answer the last question since I think it relates with the others.





The most difficult question to answer is that which relates to other people. So instead of asking yourself 'why she is not ready for a relationship?' better to ask yourself, 'why do you want one with her?' Being great with her is entirely your perspective, not hers.








By the way, please clarify your position. From where I come from, having a relationship is not the same as being in love. Do you love her or you just want a relationship? Unless you can honestly answer this, you will always have questions in your mind because, apparently, she has a different definition of things.

Help pleeaassseee! relationship advice needed?

I am a Senior, and the girl is a junior. We have never talked, but she told 2 of my friends that she thought i was cute. Since then (2 weeks ago) everybody has made a big deal out of it, so i havent talked to her. Seniors (me) recently graduated so i wont even bump into her anymore. I have her screenname, and I want to get to know her. What is the best way to go about this? If i try to do it through AIM, how can i work the conversation without it getting awkward since we have never talked? Thanks for the help.Help pleeaassseee! relationship advice needed?
you perv you can not go out wit a girl younger than you how is she how old is you that is wat is up first send a lil emails just to start a conversation and then you get to know her better and well you migh one day have the confidence to ask her out and if it is the summer then maybe someone might throw a party and well invite her and let me tell you his is froma girl do not make a move unless she looks at you over and over again and look away and it might be a brezze and get a sweater and put it on her and put your arm around her plz dont forget the sweatrerHelp pleeaassseee! relationship advice needed?
grrrrr, just talk that's all, there's nothing wrong if you really want to talk to her. I would say she's just a jonior so forget about her, find someone your own age so you can get along more my having more similar opinions.

I need relationship advice on how to mature and become a more loving girlfriend?

I am in my first serious relationship and I am 19. My boyfriend is 21. I have had an abusive ex-boyfriend and an abusive father who was imprisoned for his symptoms. The guy I am now seeing is my boyfriend of 5 months and I could not ask for a more respectful person. He treats me right and that is what matters. Unfortunately I am at a very stressful part in my life as I am trying to go to school full time and work 75 hours a week to pay my bills. I get very easily frustrated and sometimes the silliest things he says can upset me. Maybe I need to mature as this is the only guy I have felt love for but I know I dont want to lose him because of my stupidity. I am at a loss and dont know what to do. We get into arguments over meaningless jokes and I get too easily offended. He told me before that he doesnt know how much longer he can take this. When we argue it is about 4 times a week but we are always together except for when we are at school or work. When we are happy it is theI need relationship advice on how to mature and become a more loving girlfriend?
Treat him like your equal, Ask him ';Why do you think we argue 4 times a week? I will tell you. LIFE IS VERY SHORT. Ask yourself. Is this what I want for the rest of life? If not, You already know the answer. Do what needs to be done and get on with your life. Once a cheater always a cheater!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! At 19 years of age its hard to make the right decision%26gt;I need relationship advice on how to mature and become a more loving girlfriend?
You are stressed out..


and big time


that is a big Job managing school and work, especially with how much you are working...


You need to sit down with him and Talk, Talk about how you are feeling, telling him what you are feeling..tell him that you don;t mean to take it out on him...


If you find yourself getting irritated, apologize to him..


Never stop saying you are sorry..


He will appreciate it and start to understand your stress more..


Also if you love him, tell him you love him and all the time, men love that..


Men like being treated like baby...


Cuddle him, hold him,


pamper him, hug and kiss him


He will enjoy that..


Show him that you need him..


That he is a special part of your life.


Talk to him, that's the most important thing I can tell you to do..


If he really loves you and enjoys your company when you are as sweet as you can be, he will stick around, and love you through thick and thin...


I know you said you've been through some hard times in your life, but those actions don't have to reflect upon you..


Do not use this as a crutch, hold your head high, and from here on out say, ';yes this is what I survived through, but this is what made me who I am today';.


Remember what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger!


Good Luck

I need RELATIONSHIP advice from you guys, Please?

I began dating my GF 15 mos. ago. It was long distance, though we saw each other alot, so that was no problem. It was bliss between us and she called me all the time, did sweet and thoughtful things for me, wanted sex all the time, and was very much into me. At about 10 moved back and began acting slightly clingy/possessive, which I've never been before. She broke up w/ me for 1 month and we then got back together and have been ever since. Recently she has told me she is not happy, and has been trying to force it. This obviously hurt me since I care alot about her. She has not called as much, doesnt sound excited to talk to me, and is very business like sometimes. It is back and forth. I do alot for her and am always there. People have given me advice that I need to be less available, masculine, and become a challenge. My question is that I know this works initially but do you think this can help my relationship by a different approach. I want to do whatever it takes and need advice...I need RELATIONSHIP advice from you guys, Please?
Yes, grow a back bone and don't be at her beck and call let he do the chasing, maybe she find the relationship boring and you don't excite her anymore cos your always there, ever heard absence makes the heart grow fonder, you need to put the passion back into it like how it was in the begining, you need to act like your just started dating.I need RELATIONSHIP advice from you guys, Please?
sounds like you are honestly in love with the girl, you need to talk to her. she might be still hurting when you ignored her, if it doesn't work out (her being possessive), it's not meant to be.
i was in a similar situation with my boyfriend a few years ago..it started getting too serious too quick and i started feeling a little suffocated by him (he was also the jeolous type)..when i told him how i felt he got kinda mad and tried to fight with me about it and then left in a rage...about an hour later he came to my house with flowers and said he really wanted to be with me and told me he'd give me as much space as i needed..i thought that was really sweet...


if you really are willing to do whatever it takes, you should tell her that and it might mean giving her some time and some space...

Help with Relationship advice?

need some help last year this girl and I hung out until she went overseas for a semester. Kind of lost contact but over thanksgivign break ran intoeachother again and she initiated contact and started hanging out more and we planned on hanging out over xmas break, which we did, this time more serious. Have plans to hangout when she comes home. We both like each other but she goes to school about seven hours away will be done this spring im done with school. We have both known each other for a long time.i want to keep in contact with her but i dont want to seem desperate or to pushy. We have a great time with each other when we are together, great chemistry, We never really talked about dating or anything we just have fun together, I didnt want to brign it up cuz i knw she would be leavign soon. I more about staying close, talking, hang out a lil and seeing what happens when she comes home What should i do to keep this girl interest level in me high while she is still @ schoolHelp with Relationship advice?
just keep on making plans with her and hanging out





phone conversation is a good thing lol

lip cream

I need relationship advice, I really have no idea what to do?

Ok, so my boyfriend has been acting really strange lately, he told me he is depressed because he's been stuck at home from work because of an injury and is missing being away from home. But he didn't really start acting all too strange until one night he asked me what I was thinking and I didn't tell him...which i never do because I'm too embarrassed or scared that it might make him upset. I was actually going to tell him that I was worrying that I was bothering him and stuff but before I could make myself do it he fell asleep so I just forgot about it. When I left his house the next day he seemed fine until that evening which is when he told me he was depressed from work. After that he started talking a bit less and stopped calling me babe or baby which before he had done constantly. He seemed upset at me one night and didn't talk to me again until the middle of the next day and that was only after i sent him a text and he barely talked. That night we actually talked for quite a while so I thought he was fine. But today when I texted him the conversation was very short and he hasn't tried to talk to me at all since. I'm getting depressed now because I think I did something wrong but I'm not sure and I'm afraid to ask him if he is upset at me or if it is only work. Normally he asks me when I have to work so I can come stay with him when I'm not working and he hasn't even mentioned it...well I'm off tomorrow and I'm not sure if I should ask him if he wants me to come visit or if I should just leave things alone until he starts acting normal. What should I do? I really care for him alot and I don't want to mess things up.I need relationship advice, I really have no idea what to do?
ask him what's the problem and be straight to him ;)

Adults please? relationship advice.?

my boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 2 years now, and i just dont know wether i want to be with him or not i love him but i feel like i might not be 'in love' with him anymore. since our relationship is long distance its hard to find time for each other and i know he doesnt put the same effort into our relationship as he did. however i do know that he is still besotted with me still in love and treasures me, i just dont see any of that, in his attitude, behaviour, things he does etc, the romance is slipping and i feel almost caught up becausee i want to be with him i just dont feel the same affection. we were each others first time so i dont wanna throw it all away. please help me make sense of my feelings. thank you in advance Adults please? relationship advice.?
im that guy in a long distance relationship


let me give u a guys point of view because my girlfriend said those exact words


its not that he doesnt love you


its that sometimes a guy feels that with every lovey dovey thing he has to top it...and if he cant he wont...he feels like he's not good enough because also...hes not there


we feel incompetent or we feel like we cant fulfill your needs


if you begin to withdraw ur emotions its only going to set off a ping pong reaction and hes going to continue to withdraw his feelings


its time to have a serious talk about your relationship


find out whats making him feel the way he feels or act the way he acts


its usually never what u suspect...sometimes its not even you


trust me...just go ahead and mention it...maybe he feels he cant protect you from such a distanceAdults please? relationship advice.?
Long distance relationships are hard to handle if he's not putting up any efforts into it then you got a problem. Try talking to him and tell him how you feel if he uses the same excuse this is where you have to put your foot down. Everything else is up to you I hope it turns out the way you want it.
seems like everyone has the problem when they believe they are ';not in love'; with their partner anymore. it sounds like you already made up your mind here. if you don't feel the same, what makes you think it will change? i wouldn't count on that moment when it will all be clear. yes, its going to be harder because yall are each other first. just take what you have learned from each other and apply it to a diffrent relationship. seems like yall have grown into diffrent people being away from each other.
listen ur just a common skeez that needs attention, theres nothing wrong with that. find a guy that you can actually be with and not just talk to.
I recently had this issue. I have been dating my boyfriend for a year now. And I recently moved away for family reasons, and it's a nice long drive to see each other. Anyway, I have felt as if I didn't love him. And if I didn't know then maybe I don't, and I shouldn't say it. So I actually told him the last time we were together. I told him I couldn't say it anymore. Things in our relationship needed to be repaired, and he listened, and it is something to work out in time. So hoepfully if you talk, he will listen. Then give him the opportunity to talk, too. You will feel a lot better. I do.