I need relationship advice!!?

ok ladies,


here's the deal.me and this woman were dating and then after awhile she ran into a lot of stress with looking for a place to move to, raising a kid, looking for a new job and what not. so she decided that she really wasn't ready for a relationship. she wants to go back to being friends and if we go somewhere from there then okay. but she said she just wasn't ready. she still wants to hang out and stuff. i really do love her so i'm confused. should i take it at face value and realize she wasn't ready yet and hangout with her and see what happens. so why is she not ready for relationships especially when i was so great to her.I need relationship advice!!?
Sound like she just did not want to hurt you feelings. If you do still want to be with her, you should remain CLOSE friends but do not try to make any moves on her and nicely reject hers if attempted (at least for a good while). You should start dating other girls and inform her of this like you would to a good guy friend. After a while she will realize what she lost and the rest will fall in to place just don't run back you need to walk back for this to work.I need relationship advice!!?
well just be nice and kind and don't go to fast with it.
I see what you are saying. and being a good guy and all. you need to move on. if this is stressing her out this much she may never be ready. you need to find someone who is ready to settle down and be in a long term relationship. you shouldnt wait on just one person when there are others who are waiting for a guy like you.
Don't blame yourself...if you haven't treated her right then she wouldn't want you to be friends with her. Help her a little...try looking for a place with her or just go and help her just to feel less stress...


Good Luck:0)
I had a very similar situation. A girl I was dating, and getting serious with, decided to end our relationship and just be friends. She didn't feel that she should be in a serious relationship. So, we became friends. We'd hang out but then things would get a little ';sensual'; between us. She initiated everything. So after the third-fourth time this happened I was getting confused. Did she want me as a ';booty call?'; Did she think of me as a boyfriend? What was the deal?? Basically, she did not know what she wanted. She cared about me but my values were different from hers... I was agnostic she was a super christian. Finally, I stopped seeing her and hanging out with her because she had no idea what she wanted and it was making me feel like an idiot. I tried to give her what she wanted, but she was soo confused that it blew up in her face. I'd say, take your current relationship at face value. See what happens. If she starts wanting to get frisky and such, confront her on it. If all she wants is a fling, the decision to continue that relationship is up to you. If all she wants is space. Give it to her. Maybe things will work out, but DO NOT let her take advantage of the fact that you love her. My ex still tries to get in contact with me, but I decided that it was in the best interest for us not to have a relationship.
well it hard to tell someone what they should do, cuz on the out side lookin in, u cant feel the others feelings in there relationship. since you ask tho, i would say be careful, cuz your feeling is there hers is backing up.. she is also saying in so many ways shes open to dating other people.. dont wait around for any one, you deserve better, anyone does.. you can change your heart and just be her friend, or leav her alone... sorry
for 1 she has a lot on her plate and a man ontop of it all just adds stress. Just stay by her side help her where she needs it and as soon as all the stress is gone she can thank you and relaxe. I hope it does work out but you do have to put yourself in her shoes and see how hard it is for her.
i think that she might need time to straighten her life a little bit before going into a relationship
If you really love her you'll wait for her. I suggest helping her kids or finding an appartment. It will help remove the stress. Another thing is dont take it personally. She is probably just trying to figure out some things with herself right now.





Hope everything works out
you need to give her some time cuz she has stress
funny how you did not mention your relashonship with the ';kid'; at any time. isnt it. its because you do not care one bit about that child only you care about is sex with the women.
well shes worried so take it a day at a time
It's hard but you sound like you really love her. Stand by her side during this rough patch. She seems to know that you'll be supportive otherwise she would of just broken up with you with no chance at a future.


Be strong it's hard but you guys will come out of this stronger for the love and support you gave her through a diffucult time.


Communicate as well. Knowing where she's at and where she's going will help you understand how she's doing with things.


Good Luck!
the thing that i would recommend is just to be there for her. she may need you to watch her kid sometime, do her the favor. the more respectful, kind, and helpful you are the more chances you may have. but for now, stick to being a good helpful friend.
Sounds like she is ready to slow down. I don't think she wants to be anything but friends. It is possible that it has something to do with her child or the move.
She is very preocupied and is under a lot of stress as you say. It shouldn't come as a real shock to see that she isn't ready. Ready, as in not ready to move into a relationship because she has to solve more urgent things. She trusts that you are a great guy and wants to stay with you even after the ordeal is over so that the relationship can resume. So don't give up hope, she hasn't dumped you or anything. She just needs to get more urgent things done before she can spend more time with you. So as her friend, help her in any way possible to lessen her load. That way, you two can bond much more and the relationship will be better than before. Good luck.
I think she really loves you too. She realizes that shes going through too much in her life that she can't give you her all. I dont think that she thinks it's fair to you to put in the effort on your part of the relationship and she's not. Just be her friend, be there for her in her time of need. and when she's ready, she'll let you know. respect her for breaking it off when she knows that she cant put an equal effort in instead of using you.
If you let anyone play with your heart, they will break it.


You are about to respect her feeling as she steps on your?





Tell her you are ready for a relationship, take it or leave it, then you can give her a little time to straighten out.
mmm im sorry to here that but she wanst ready and we cant change that what you can change is her mind not what has already happened sooooooooo i want you to tell her how u feel and and tell her its ok you'll walk her through it and then slowly solve all the problems she had like the finding a proper job raising a kid getting a place to move.. walk here through it step by step as if your really are in a realationship you did say you loved her and then tell her can you get back together


wish you best of luck


-Khadeja
Some people just don't think that they can handle a relationship with everything else going on in their lives. I don't think its that she doesn't like you. She will tell you when she is ready. For now just stay friends and give her the space she needs
give her the chance to get settled again raising a kid is tough be there for her but yet give her the space she needs and if u love her and she loves you then it will work out
Sounds like she is a smart woman and needs to focus on the real issues that are effecting her and her childs life. Looking for another job and a new place to live is very stressful. Maybe she just need you there for moral support for now, and as a friend.


And if you are demanding (in some sort of way - like when can I see you.?.etc..) And she isn't sure, that may be stressing her out. You can still love her as a friend, but give her space to get her life together.. You know they say, you can't love another until you love yourself, and right now she may not feel very secure about herself because of her very stressful situation.


I understand her point, nothing against you, she just need to focus on her life right now. Just be there for her.
She probably just got overwhelmed and scared. If shes not completely pushing away from you, I'd say wait it out. Maybe she just really wasn't ready for it, but she thinks that with time she will, and she wants to be with you when she is.
Set a time limit for yourself. If not ready for a relationship by that time, move on.
She has a lot of things on her mind right now, like you said she's under a lot of stress. Just let some of those things pass and when she'll have more free time it will be back to what it was like before.
sounds like she's using you





its up to you if you carry on letting her - but I think its a recipe for hurt if you do





Try and be strong and protect yourself





My advice would be to drop all contact as you like her more than a friend - and she wants to call all the shots





She is a commitment phobe - for whatever reasons from her past - but don't you want a REAL relationship?....a 2 way thing?





She is happy to call the shots and will crush you - believe me!





sorry to say it





but cut your losses.....give yourself time to recover - and find someone who's not scared of having a relationship!!!
Talk to her. Say that you are confused. dont say it at a bar but do say it at a romantic place. Say that you do love her and say if you are not ready to have a relationship with me (meaning you) then say that youll wait for her until she is ready. peace ;)
I would venture to answer the last question since I think it relates with the others.





The most difficult question to answer is that which relates to other people. So instead of asking yourself 'why she is not ready for a relationship?' better to ask yourself, 'why do you want one with her?' Being great with her is entirely your perspective, not hers.








By the way, please clarify your position. From where I come from, having a relationship is not the same as being in love. Do you love her or you just want a relationship? Unless you can honestly answer this, you will always have questions in your mind because, apparently, she has a different definition of things.