I need relationship advice.?

I have been engaged for almost 8 years now. My fiance and I have discussed why we haven't gotten married yet and he always seems to put all the blame on me. He says that I have no drive to do anything with my life. It is true that I am not sure what career path I want, but that shouldn't be a reason to not get married. There is a long list of other reasons but they all seem to have to do with me. I just feel like he thinks that I am not good enough to marry. I have told him this but of course he says that is not the issue. I love him and I have begun to move in with him but I am not sure if he is the right person for me and I don't want to move anymore of my stuff in until I know for sure. Please help!!I need relationship advice.?
Sounds like you have good communication and are open with talking to him. I'd tell him just that, he says you're good enough to marry, then have him prove it. Set a date and start planning - actions speak louder than words. I'd tell him that because it's been 8 years, he always blames you, that it makes you have some doubts because you don't understand the real reason because the ones he gives you have nothing to do with getting married, if he really loves you and wants to get married to set a date. If he can't do that, or give you a good reason why, then tell him maybe it's time to move on.I need relationship advice.?
I would be skepical too, he may begin to feel comfortable with you there and see no point in having papers that make it legal. Problem is kids want their Father and Mother to share the same name so they have same name as both. If you don't plan to have a family you all are ok, if you do want children, I would stay away till married or hold off on kids till married.





Spend some time thinking about a career by taking a few different classes at the school close to you. Why so you have to do anything at all antways? Can't you be an at home Mom?
8 Years lady you don麓t have any drive.
Stop Look, And listen. Do you have a lot of doubts about things.


are you happy, are you worried a lot. Don't try to save anything run don't look back.
If you guys were right for each other, you would have gotten married by now. You're not engaged, you're procrastinating. Engaged includes a ring and a date that you're working toward... it's not an abstract goal.
After 8 years, if you still do not know if this guy is right for you, he's not. Being engaged for 8 years should've told you that already.
think about urself for a minute; what u want to be and what u have to do; do it, w/ or w/out him u have to do urself first.


My opinion_ If u move in w/him u will never get married !
You should be thankful that you haven't married him yet!


Don't waste anymore time with him! You obviously deserve someone that appreciates you and doesn't make you feel like you are not ';worthy'; of marriage.
That is something that you and he need to figure out.


Ask yourself the main question: Are you happy?


You need to sit down and talk to him some more and if he makes excuses again and continues to blame you then maybe it isn't meant to be. Only your heart knows how you feel and what you want to do. If you are having doubts, talk to him!


I hope you figure out the right decision.


But you deserve to be happy and if is making you feel like you aren't good enough, then he is wrong.


Good Luck!





P.S. Follow your heart!
Well you made a commitment when you said yes to the engagement. If you dont know if he is the one for you than take it slower and cut the engagement right now so that you can figure it out. The grass isnt always greener on the other side so its how much effort you want to put into this relationship.
Love is a risk. I think after eight years you would have taken the risk. Maybe you are ready, but obviously he isn't. Seems like he is comfortable in his current situation. Despite how difficult, walk, no, wait run. Run, take the risk and your life will feel more complete without him. If you wait for life to come to you, you'll never fully live. Take it or leave it, true happiness comes from taking risks
I think you need to sit down and figure out your life. I don't think that this engagment problem is ALL your fault. I think that its just easier for him to blame you than to say he has some problems too. Don't blame it all on yourself, but talk to someone who is objective and try to get some direction in your life. You are doubting if he is the ';one';, I'd be a bit worried too. Just work on yourself, then see what happens!
So, this man blames you for problems the two of you have, criticizes you for your ';lack of drive,'; and you're not sure if he's the right one for you, yet you're engaged to him?? Honey, if you haven't figure out after EIGHT years if he's the one for you, why are you still with him??? My advice is MOVE ON.
He says it is not the issue, but it is the issue, so pay attention to this detail. He is playing the blame game, and when you say to him I feel like I am not good enough to marry ,he says that is not so , because he wants you to blame. Pay attention to your feelings, they are guides to help us in our lives. Do not deny your feelings. The right person for you to spend your time with is , Someone that make you feel good about you, someone that makes you feel alive, excited about life. someone who respect you, someone who adores you. You may think this is a dream, but I will tell you that I would rather live alone, then to be with someone who makes me feel bad about myself. Love does not blame, it only loves. Make a long list of other reasons that he says has to do with you, and ask yourself if this is the person I want to marry . This 8 Years you have had with him gives you heads up on this relationship, you have a lot of valuable information , use it for your benefit. I agree with your feelings, now what are you going to do for YOU.
if you have been engaged for 8 yrs there is def something wrong, if you have to question it then you dont need to be with him
Eight years is a really long engagement. Sounds like he doesn't want the commitment. He should love you for who you are right now. I bet when you do find your path you wont want to be with him anymore. He should be building up your self esteem not tearing it down.
If after 8yrs you are not sure he is the one, he is probably not. When someone loves you, they accept you the way you are.
you should have left after the second year stop wasting time he doesent know what he wants so let him go
if after 8 yrs you both still have doubts MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE... getting married is not going to make those doubts disapear
look this relationship is a lost cause, you have wasted 8 good years do not wasted any more. he does not want to married you ,let it go . good luck to you.
If you're not sure of what to do after 8 years, then you really need to seek some therapy. Whether you go by yourself or as a couple, you are needing some professional guidance on where to go from here. Good luck!