Monday, August 23, 2010

Kind of need some relationship advice, please :)?

What would you do in my situation.





My girlfriend is 18 years old and very beautiful. She works as a waitress at a resturant and always gets hit on by her male coworkers. She goes out every monday with them socially. She's a very flirty, independent, and social woman. I see her maybe 3 days a week or less due to the distance between us (40min) because of to college.


I get very jelious of her male coworkers because I dont trust them. Its not that I dont trust her, its that I dont trust them. I have no reason to believe she would cheat on me but being so far away my mind goes nuts wondering what in heck is going on.


How do I get over this? Just grow some balls and say eff it- and move on like its nothing?


I myself am very independent as well as I have no real ';friends.'; I almost feel like she doesn't need my company any more... but I know thats the case. Help?!Kind of need some relationship advice, please :)?
actually that is normal ... but if you keep questioning her she may start to take it as accusing her and that will drive her away from you ... you know she could wonder about you too .. maybe you should make some friends and go out on Mondays also so you in return would be able to talk about your friends to her ... trust is very important in a relationship .. and remember you said you trusted her .... so act likeKind of need some relationship advice, please :)?
it actually will and its quite normal.but i have no idea how it should b solved. its a sensitive matter
You have told her that when she tells you of all the things John, Grant or James and her do and talk about BOTHERS you, BUT, she still does this?





Sounds to me like she has no intention or respecting your feelings, or is totally insensitive to them, so either you are going to have to accept this relationship on HER terms or forget it. She is not likely to CHANGE, so either YOU do, or there is no chance this will work.
The bottom line is if you have trust in her, then it shouldn't be an issue for you. I was in a similiar relationship were he hated that men hit on me, or even talked to me for that matter. It caused such an issue that I broke up with him over it because it told me over and over again that he didn't trust me. Your concern should be more on your g/f and what she wants (you), then on the thoughts of others. We can't control what others think about, or want for that matter, but if we are secure in our relationship don't worry so much about it. You should talk to your g/f again though, and express that when you are talking with her, you would like it to be about the two of you, and not about the ';brothers'; at work. If she does want to be with you, this shouldn't be an issue. I do advise not saying ';I don't want you to hang out with those guys'; as that just tells her you don't trust her and will push her farther away from you.
If you truly trust her then u don't need to worry about the other guys and wether u trust them or not. If you are good to her and make her happy (especially emotionally) then she will have no reason to have any interest in these guys outside of friendship. The worst thing u can do is act overly jealous, or constantly question her about this. She will think u are controlling and will start to stray from u. It is ok to say u feel jealous sometimes (so she knows u care), but tell her u totally trust her and know that she would never do anything to hurt u. Good luck :-)
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