Insecure guy seeks relationship advice. Please read.?

Hi, i've been dating a guy who is stubborn, unsupportive and doesn't seem to understand my troubled past with guys at all.


Ever since we started seeing each other I will admit, I have been very skeptical... by no fault of my own though !


I've told him my history and he's very aware of my insecurities and my issues regarding trust. However, he doesn't seem to take them into account when they arise. He's currently talking to another guy, I don't understand how he could possibly think that's OK with me, but whatever.It is his prerogative after all. ******I've never addressed it with him***** (is that a problem ?), but he says he's known him for longer than he's known me, and they're now within ';friend'; boundaries. It still bothers me, though, knowing that he AT LEAST, even if nothing is actually going on, has another guy in his life that is interested in him. All of this turns over in my mind each time he cancels on our dates, doesn't call, or is out of the house.


It makes me wonder, ';when he's not talking to me is he talking to him ?'; Like on New Year's, when i left home he had told me that he would call me the next day. But did I receive a call from him ? No.


However, when I checked his myspace comments I found out that he had called his ';friend'; the night he was supposed to call me.


What's worse is he provided no excuse, or thorough reason as to why he didn't call. I would've understood if that was the case.


Everything he does or says, i can't seem to believe wholeheartedly. I want to, but it's hard for me not to worry. I don't feel like he feels as passionately about me as he says he does.





It's not so much that I doubt everything he says, it's just that I'm trying to protect myself from disappointment. I called him last night to explain myself, and he made it clear to me that ';before we can continue seeing eachother, i need to work on myself.'; ';i'; being myself., not him.





I'm upset because I'm not top priority. I know that sounds bad, but I feel that since he isn't part of the solution, he is only being a part of the problem. I am aware that he is entitled to have his own life, but I don't think he is being very considerate %26amp; needs to at least help me work on my low self-esteem, rather than abandoning me like everyone else. I feel like if he cared for me at least half as much as he says he does, then he would be more supportive.





What are everyone's thoughts?..


Am I right in feeling that he is being unsupportive? Also, what should I do? I don't want to lose what I have with him, or even take the risk. I don't feel like he understands how much he is hurting me by talking to other people. Am I being jealous, or petty ? And how should I go about bringing the topic up if I was to call him tonight.


Thanks in advance.Insecure guy seeks relationship advice. Please read.?
I don't comment these things...


Hmm...


Well, sounds to me like you're not willing to risk anything for the sake of attempting to better your relationship. If that is the case, then there is nothing anyone here can do for you, or anything you can do for yourself for that matter. You sound like a nice guy, and you sound like you deserve better. But if you don't take a chance and ';step out on a limb';, nothing will change. You need to talk to him, TELL him about your worries. And if he doesn't understand? Then let him run off to his little friend, because you can find someone who WILL understand and care.


Take a chance. You never know what might happen until you try, right?Insecure guy seeks relationship advice. Please read.?
so why you keep comparing your old relationship with your new one?


sorry to tell you dude but you are a drama queen that's why he broke up with you?


be more free with yourself, allow people to make mistakes, find your own center, don't project your unhappiness in your relationships.


sorry


i really care.


you already lost it
You want an honest-to-goodness reaction?





DUMP HIM!!! For Pete's sake.





Don't be a martyr. Gays are born winners and not sore losers. You deserve a much better and fair treatment than what he is doing to you right now.





Have a nice day.
DUMP HIM!





He shouldn't be ';talking'; to other guys while dating you. You have a right to want exclusivity in your relationship, and honestly, it's safer since you don't even know this third person.





Look at yourself. Really look. Do YOU think you deserve this? Or do you want more? Are you ready for more?





Shield your heart. Don't allow someone to walk over you because you're afraid of messing up the status quo. You're not happy with status quo now, why stay?





You are a good person, not matter what. You deserve someone ho wants you and only you. You deserve better than to worry about what your bf is doing, knowing his is dating other people. Remove yourself from the equation.





Finally, work on yourself. Take time for YOU and no one else. Find out what you like and don't like; what makes you happy. Screw everyone else. Look in yourself to find confidence and calm to move you forward -- so you can pursue want makes you happy. I really hope you do leave this guy and find how awesome you are. Don't let this situation control you. You will find a guy for whom you are his heart.